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Blue Slaad Cobbler

When I came to the Summoning Grounds it was to clear a debt, not for the love of serving drunk patrons and especially not for baking. Nevertheless, one day a stool pigeon bet me an 8-crease that I couldn’t make something edible out of his most recent procurement while traveling somewhere near Lanarin. Or was it some thorpe with a forgettable name out beyond Gloamingwood? It doesn’t matter. It wasn’t pride that made me accept the bet. No, it was a desire to clear my debt and get the hell out of my service. I didn’t expect the traveler to produce a sizable pouch of blue slaad tadpole, but produce them he did. To my surprise, they didn’t look all that unlike the blueberries I serve with certain cocktails. Thinking of days gone by (my misspent youth), I recalled the cobblers that the village baker made back home. Thus was born the Blue Slaad Cobbler, and my first attempt ever at baking.

Blue Slaad Cobbler
Blue Slaad Cobbler

Blue Slaad Cobbler

Oft-requested dessert item that was born out of a bet.
Prep Time10 minutes
Cook Time1 hour 5 minutes
Keyword: blueberry, cobbler, slaad tadpoles
Servings: 8

Ingredients

  • 1/2 cup butter
  • 1 cup self-rising flour
  • 1 cup white sugar
  • 1 cup milk
  • 4 cups fresh blue slaad tadpoles

Instructions

  • Get your oven heated to 350° F.
  • Once the oven is at temperature, put your butter into a baking dish (8-inch square works best...the one pictured is 6" x 8" and I ended up with excess batter).
  • Stir all of the ingredients except the tadpoles together in a bowl. Pour the batter over the butter once it's melted. Then sprinkle your tadpoles all across the top.
    DON'T MIX!
    Return to oven.
  • Bake for about 1 hour, ensuring that a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean. I admit, this step seems pretentious, but it works.
  • Serve hot or at room temperature.

Notes

You can prepare this for the squeamish by substituting the tadpoles for fresh blueberries. You can hardly tell the difference anyway.

Blue Slaad Cobbler

I’m not gonna sit here and moralize on whether you should or shouldn’t eat slaadi or their immature youth. All I can tell you is that people request this dish often enough that now I even sell it to local establishments for them to supplement their own offerings. Umrick gives me a cut of the profit, albeit a small one. The vegetarian version isn’t as popular, but it’s requested regularly enough. That’s good for us because the chap who wagered I couldn’t make something worth eating with the tadpoles never paid up. Make people show their coins before you accept a bet. Anyway, sourcing blue slaad tadpoles ain’t cheap.

If you ever hear of a scraggly vagrant bragging about fleecing ol’ Jäckel out of a gold coin, do me a solid and gimme those details. There may be a whole cobbler in it for ya. Last I heard he was evading the Plums out by the Cliffs of Despair on some unrelated charges. I don’t care if the guy is guilty or even if justice is served except for the money he owes me. I figure he’ll eventually get what’s comin’ to him one way or another. But I don’t want it happening before I get paid you see. Umrick won’t give me leave to pursue the vagabond myself. He threatened to turn my debt over to collectors if I skipped town again. Problems I just don’t need right now.

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